We must do away with ALL the explanations

Dear reader,

for several months I wasn’t feeling too well, as you know. Now 100 people will have 100 explanations in terms of why. I’ve also been part of an intensive online programme where a bit less than 1,000 women are meeting together and learning about ancient wisdom, Chinese medicine, rituals, spirituality, manifestation, care, relationships, etc. It is a very nice community with high vibes and pleasant energy, however I’ve discovered that instead of feeling empowered, I am not benefiting personally. I have begun to neglect my own work, my own path, because I’ve spent too much time in this programme. Until I finally noticed it is probably not the best place for me to be at the moment. Shortly said, I discovered one thing: in order to get things done and move forward in your life

Do Not Educate Yourself Too Much.

I learned about myself, that I don’t want to be trapped in any kind of dogma, not even no-dogma. It just does not fit in with me. I refuse to believe that people can be classified, analysed. Or completely understood. It might be my limited capacity of comprehension and ability to conceptualise, if so, be it. I do not have to be smart. I do not have to be right. I do not have to be anything, really. So while trying to find explanations for my recent health problems, I forgot to live. And of course, not to get me wrong, I guess we, people are prone to looking for explanations, meaning, making sense, me including. But for me, I figured that I don’t have to know everything even if I could. Nor do I want to know everything. In fact, I’d rather not. I do not want to be obsessed with healthy diet, rituals, exercises, self care, knowledge about how things work, when and why. For me, the opposite position is the only way not to be wrong and get at least somewhat close to discovering what works for you. In my line of work, working with people with severe problems, difficulties, traumas or challenges (some would even call it diagnosis), my clients taught me one thing: you never know how and why something happened or what your solution will look like. Hence any attempt to explain and/or understand is an attempt leading to a dead end street. My clients have taught me that people make all sorts of meanings in so many ways, that it is simply wrong to try to make sense or generalise human collective experience.

If that in the eyes of some, makes me stupid, shortsighted, resistant, not willing to change or develop, so be it. But for me is quite on the contrary. When you do away with all the explanations, as Wittgenstein said, you are finally able to see things as they are, not things you think they are. Things for you, of course, for others they might be something completely different.

So I’ll stop educating myself and will stop following. I’ll continue living instead, like I used to – brilliantly, passionately, without the urge to understand, comprehend or explain. Creating contents some people can relate to, inspiring people in my own way, not trying to persuade anyone how they should be living their lives and being happy, if because of my influence, someone managed to find his or her way forward.

Happy Christmas and thank you Universe, for this small reminder 🙂 And thank you dear reader, for your kind presence. Wish you a miraculous holiday 🙂

Biba

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I simply like having life happen as it happens. I like being unprepared.

Turquoise Blue Coast or how we are never happy with what is

Dear reader,

happy 2016! Hope you’ve celebrated it just the way you like most.

I’ve spent it in Sahara and they don’t celebrate New Year’s eve. This travelling was a gift for my husband’s anniversary as he’s always wanted to see the desert. So we saw the desert of Northern Africa. It is so amazing how different people live and what their life circumstances are. Since I’ve travelled a lot and have visited many continents, you could say I’m an experienced traveller (which is quite different to being a tourist!). Now I’m beginning to really appreciate the European continent. It just isn’t a matter of course to recycle rubbish or obey traffic lights. It is far from everyday use to have a drinking water and clean sheets. Not to mention the choice to have a variety of foods available or plenty of clothes on demand or being able to walk dressed as you like in a company you choose.

This time I really felt lucky to be born in Europe – it is for me the best continent to live with the mildest climate and the most beautiful landscape. Also, I’m beginning to appreciate our ancestor’s efforts to create social security system based on solidarity and humanistic values. It didn’t just happen – somebody had to work hard to make it happen. And during these nervous times we can loose it faster than a blink of an eye.

We’ve made new friends and all of them have expressed desire to escape and move to Europe even though they love their countries. Us that were born there, are extremely lucky. Suddenly I have no desire to travel anymore – I’m happy to realize I live in the most precious gem of this beautiful Earth.

These were the thoughts rolling through my mind as our journey was coming to the end and I was beginning to be fed up with dirty trains and cigarette rooms. Until the minute we got home. There was plenty of mail waiting for me and on January 2nd I got two terribly bad news – I owe a huge amount of money to the tax administration and my Ribalon didn’t get the funding for the 2016. What a lovely way off to a fresh start into 2016. I’ve no idea how I’m going to get out of this and once more, I’ll have to start over.

And yet, what’s interesting here, is how our aspirations and expectations change according to horizon. We are never happy and satisfied with what is, we are constantly looking for something else – for that turquoise blue coast on the other side, that looks perfect from the distance, but only as long as you are far enough so you cannot reach it. That same pattern emerges with human relationship – until we have it, it looks tempting and inviting, but as soon as we get it, it disappoints us in one way or another.

This is ego. There is some nice proverb that goes something like

Poor is not the one who doesn’t have much. Poor is the one who needs a lot.

So to start a new year, if you celebrate it or not, how about we start off right where we are with what we have? We actually have SO much and for many, this is the turquoise blue coast … or a sandy desert 🙂

Welcome to 2016. Stay connected.

Biba

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The desert. Feels like eternity.